Leisure for Pleasure: How to Take Charge of Your Leisure Time

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Julie and Rick are young professionals with plenty of money to spend on leisure activities. They go along with the trend, whether it's bridge or squash or cycling, because it's what "everybody" is doing. Julie and Rick seldom consider their own needs and preferences. So it's not surprising that they often find their leisure activities unfulfilling.

Maureen, a school teacher, mishandles her leisure time by playing the "someday game." In other words, Maureen is a procrastinator. Friends and co-workers often hear her saying things like "Someday I'll learn French," or "Someday I'll join an exercise class," or "Someday I'll do volunteer work." Maureen doesn't seem to realize that "someday" is not a day of the week.

George, a soon to retire salesperson, promised himself that he would take up golf, and would satisfy a secret yearning to do landscape painting. George isn't likely to tackle either of these leisure pursuits unless he overcomes his fear of failing and looking foolish. George overlooks the fact that no one starts out as an expert—a lot of time, effort, and frustration go into either a good game of golf or a beautiful painting.

How We Mishandle Leisure

We don't all mishandle our leisure the same ways as Julie, Rick, Maureen, and George. Many people exclude themselves from the pleasures of leisure by assuming that recreational participation involves spending a lot of money. Others miss out on leisure experiences simply because they don't know what is available or how to get involved. And still others avoid leisure by keeping compulsively busy. They fill up free time with tasks and obligations that resemble work, to avoid having unstructured time on their hands.

In fact, leisure has a negative connotation for many of us. It is viewed as a frill-something that is shallow and boring. And more people than you might imagine experience twinges of guilt when they take time out to relax in the sun or smash a tennis ball around a court.

What we tend to forget is that our lives need balance—we need both work and leisure. In their book Healthy Pleasures, Robert Ornstein, Ph.D. and David Sobel, M.D., say, "Having something you love to do, not for the pay of it, but just for the sake of it, is the essence of recreation." They go on to say, "Some kind of hobby seems an essential compliment to healthy work."

When we have a negative attitude toward leisure, we stop ourselves from living fully. We all need chances to grow, learn, and change; to do creative and enjoyable things; to develop positive relationships. Leisure can provide us with all these opportunities. What's more, leisure experiences can reduce the stress in our lives.

That we mishandle our leisure time is not surprising. The vast majority of us had never given leisure much serious thought. We consider it simply "time free from work or duties." And so, it's unlikely that most of us have ever thought of transforming our free time into what the experts say it could be—a meaningful experience that enhances our quality of life. In other words, it's not enough to have free time, we could be using it creatively and also enjoy it.

Expanding Your Leisure Horizons

The first step forward is a willingness to admit that you're getting very little personal satisfaction when you are not working. Once you've taken that first step, here are more you can take to expand your leisure horizons.

1.) Cultivate a positive attitude toward leisure. This involves looking forward to spare time and viewing it as an important part of your life. Believe it or not, retirement counselors mention more than twenty benefits resulting from leisure activities. How many can you list?

All too often, we see only the most obvious benefits gained from a recreational pursuit. For example, many people, if asked to think about the benefits of taking art lessons, would probably come up with learning a new skill, being creative, and having the opportunity to get out and meet new people. Whereas a closer look would make them realize that perhaps the greatest benefit is the boost their self-confidence would receive when they are complimented on one of their paintings. Charles Brightbill, author of The Challenge of Leisure, puts it this way: "To be able to say "I made it" or "I mastered it" is to enlarge the personality."

2.) Discover your leisure interests. Ask yourself the following questions and write down your answers.

• Which leisure time pursuits have you enjoyed in the past?
• Which ones (recent or past) do you enjoy now?
• To which of these pursuits would you like to devote more time?
• What new activities—arts, crafts, hobbies, sports, studies, travel or volunteer work—would you like to try?